Friday, April 27, 2007

Infatuations of a normal mind

Over the years I had thought that I had grown out of infatuations. A video proved me wrong.

It was about ten years back as a straggling youth of 15 that I first fell in love. My "love" is married to some other guy and at last count she had 2 kids. The less said about that love, the better.

The two years in my plus-two saw me getting infatuated to almost anything that wore a skirt. My infatuations changed weekly. I was always pining for my beloved who kept changing her face... and her skirt.

But once I reached engineering college I became mature. At least I thought so, when I was in there. The weekly infatuations had trickled down to monthly and quarterly happenings and by the final semester I did not have any left.

I was wrong there. It was just that the infatuation cycle was growing longer. Next came work and boy oh boy there were those good looking Northie girls with Ulti figures (the Haryanvi’s and Punjabis) and seductive eyes (the Bengalis). Not to mention the suave and chic ones from our capital city. Life as they say was "beautiful"...literally.

But my maturity levels had increased far more, and this aesthetic change in environment could not offset the increasing delays of my infatuation cycle. The first sign of this decadence was when I found myself asking the name of a girl to ascertain her caste/religion etc... Before I decided to “fall or not to fall” into infatuation. At last, I was getting realistic, mature and perfectly Indian! This went on till one day I truly believed that I had gone into menopause (yes there was a paucity of words to signify end of my peculiar "cycle").

Then one of my Bengali friends gave me this video. I am not much of a music buff, and I don’t understand good music even if it hits me in the ear. But boy, I loved this one at once. The song, the way the girl moves, her face, her actions, her curly black hair, her eyes... EVERYTHING!!!!! . I would have called it the “Return of the Infatuation” if I was Bruce Lee.

Yesterday in my dream she pointed at me and sang... "you are my staaar mahiyaaaa..".. "tu hi he mera pyaar mahiyaaaa...".
Here’s the song Infatuating video

To,
My beautiful singer,
Subject: Love letter.

I LOVE YOU!!!…..

From,
An adorer suffering the pangs of “everlasting” love!

And thank you for showing me that I have not lost out on infatuation. That it has just reached the “Olympic cycle”.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Pets and Bachelors - The Rabbit Tale

When I went to my friend's home in Bangalore I was surprised to see three cute white rabbits playing around in the house. They had bought them last week from Shivaji Nagar for Rs.350. Some people are crazy about their pets and I was not so surprised to see the three being treated royally to carrots, cabbage leaves and what not. What I was not prepared to see however, was Anand holding one end of the cabbage leaf with his teeth while the other end was being bitten off by the rabbit. Looked like a "mother-feeding-kid" scene right out of animal planet.

Anand has even made a "home" for the rabbits out of the TV cover. During the day with nobody around, they stay inside their home. But as soon as somebody comes back from work they are let outside to roam around (and shit around...:)) the house.



With Six office going bachelors to look after their every need and many more like me dropping in to "coochy coo" them, they must be leading a dream life. Problem with raising rabbits is that nobody has written something akin to "100 ways on how to raise your child" on rabbits... poor fellas.

Opinions are varied on the raising techniques and destiny. Nobody kinda knows how much we need to feed them. If we overfeed will they die is the main q . Finally after a long drawn debate it has been agreed to overfeed them. At least that way they can die on a full stomach..:)
However in the matter of destiny, the two factions have reached no amicable solution. I am looking forward to fatten them up and then eat them. While Shyam and Anand have promised me that if I as much as raise my little finger on them, they will eat me first!!!

The next problem was with naming them, this was however solved very easily. Three guys in the house are now doing their onsite stints and the rabbits have been named after them. Hope the female doesn’t mind the name "Jaimon". Problem is, even Jaimon hates the name Jaimon...:).

Badai and gossiping being our main occupational hazards I was explaining the train incident with much ado and masala to Samjith(yeah I know we mallus have some funny names) when I felt something wet on my feet. To say I jumped would be an understatement. It was Jaimon on one of her "Columbus" trips to the bedroom. When I put my foot back down, she started to lick it clean. Guess it is the salt from the sweat she is looking for, or could be that I am just too hot for a female to resist..:)

This incident has been an eye opener to me. I always used to think having a pet is impossible in our bachelor environment with little space and no one at home full time. Truth is, if you really want something so bad then you can get it no matter what your limitations. Hats off to you Anand Abraham!! Thou hast shown the courage to take responsibility for three more lives! And in the process you have fulfilled your long time wish too. I say, some people have all the luck.

P.S: I would still like to eat them once they are fat you know.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Marriage for 60 acres

Marriages are made in heaven they say, but somebody forgot to add "and dowry in our world".

On my way back to Bangalore from Kerala by train this week (22-04-07), I had one of my college buddies traveling with me. He is what would be considered "hot" on the marriage market, well educated, good family, nice job and a handsome fellow. During our train journey his mother calls him up to tell about the latest marriage proposal he has got. The conversation that follows goes like this
Mom: monae(son), I have seen this girl for you.
Son: hmm...
Mom: she is from a good family in Kanjirapally(wild west of Mallu land)
Son: hmm...
Mom: she comes from a rich family, and they are offering 60 acres as dowry! and with loads of gold too.
Son: wow! 60 acres!!! Cool….
At this point the phone disconnects….

My friend is ecstatic. He tells me, I am going to get married dude, MARRIED!! Wait till I break the news to that bugger buddie2 (name changed!), he is going to be dead jealous now.
I: You haven’t seen the girl!! What if you don’t like her???
Him: Dumbo! with 60 acres of rubber who cares about the girl...
I: hmm... but you got to see the character right??....
Him: poda, you are crazy
I: k, as you wish... plz pass on my sympathies to the girl...:)
...he gets a call again from his mom at this point.

Mom: so, as I was telling you, this girl..
Son: Mom, I am ready! I am ready!
Mom: what?? What ready?
Son: Ready to marry I mean!
Mom: You Idiot! I already rejected the girl. She is not very good looking and not so sociable either.
Son(Crestfallen): but... but...
Mom: ok, bye for now. Call me once you reach Bangalore ok.
Son: ok.

Him: My mother acts as if I am some Ghandharva (heavenly male beauty). She rejects requests for the smallest of reasons.. Blah blah blah
I: don't worry dude, we will get another one with 100 acres! Take heart.
Him (still crestfallen): hmm… ok.

Moral of the story: Switch off your mobiles while traveling in a train!

P.S: My friend in truth does not really care about the dowry nor does he actually mean his words, so kindly read this one in a lighter vein....:)

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Islam, a different view and some counter views!

Today I got a mail from a friend, a normal forward that I would have normally read and deleted but since I was dead bored, I replied.

Another friend(also in the loop) replied back saying that the reply was good, hence I decided to post it, more to alleviate my boredom rather than to make a point.

The mail is about how screwed the vision of the world is when it comes to viewing Islam and muslims. Things printed in black from now on and the pictures are parts of the mail I originally got, things printed in blue are my replies to them.

1)
How true!

2)
Why a Jew can grow his beard in order to practice his faith.
But when Muslim does the same, he is an extremist and terrorist!true again, feel that each person has the right to grow his beard(or hair!)

3)
Why a nun can be covered from head to toe in order to devote herself to God.
But when Muslimah does the same she's oppressed.
The way the french authorities have banned hijab-> very autocratic, bad way of doing a thing.
Q that remains? are muslim women oppressed? i.e if at all a women does not want to wear a hijab, will her family/society accept that too? only if that is accepted can muslims claim that their women are not oppressed.

4)
When a western women stays at home to look after her house and kids she is respected because of sacrificing herself
But when a Muslim woman does so by her will, they say, "she needs to be liberated"!true! assuming that the muslim woman does so by her own will.


5)
Any girl can go to university wearing what she wills and have her rights and freedom?
But when Muslimah wears a Hijab they prevent her from entering her university!true again....

6)
When a child dedicates himself to a subject he has potential

But when he dedicates himself to Islam he is hopeless!he is not called hopeless he will be called an "upcoming terrorist"...:)

7)
When someone sacrfices himself to keep others alive, he is noble and all respect him.
But when a Palestinian does that to save his son from being killed, his brother's arm being broken, his mother being raped, his home being destroyed, and his mosque being violated -- He gets the title of a terrorist! Why? Because he is a Muslim!
If there is one struggle that is 100 percent true to its cause and truly acceptable , it is this, it is this, it is this!.

8)When there is a trouble we accept any solution? If the solution lies in Islam, we refuse to take a look at it
When someone drives a perfect car in a bad way no one blames the car.
But when any Muslim makes a mistake or treats people in a bad manner - people say "Islam is the reason"!
caution... big answer ahead!

Before the rise of "islamic" terrorism, carlos a.k.a "the jackal" was the biggest wanted terrorist in eruope, he was a christian from latin america, but he never made an organization with the name "christian" attached to it, did not do his terror acts in the name of "jesus/god" or in any way mix his actions with his christian religion, naturally nobody said terrorism had anything to do with christianity.(The same goes for bush and iraq, though he has actually once said that "God" asked him to go and attack iraq privately).

But when a muslim terrorist(who is nothing but another carlos) starts bombing or doing terror acts, the first thing he does is create an organization with "islamic" tagged to it, make videos in which he cries out "Allah-o-akbar" a thousand times, mix his religion and his god and his prophet in every possible way with his mis-deeds. Actions come with consequences, so if they do these things and then say "dont drag the name of islam into terrorism" thats not going to work.

One good example of this is kashmir. It started off as a freedom struggle by kashmiris... now it is hijacked by "islamic terrorrism", what in Gods name has a freedom struggle between kashmiris and the indian govt have to do anything with islam? why should terrorists kill kashmiri hindu pandits who themselves dont like the indain govt much? In kerala there is a huge fight going on between two factions of the orthodox church and the government is said to favour one faction, but I never heard the other faction fighting the government in the name of christianity!.

Conclusion is that if there is anybody responsible for tagging islam = terrorism it is the muslim terrorist and the moderate nothing-to-do-with-terror muslim who does not respond to this tagging. The wily americans just make use of this propaganda that the muslim has so helpfully created for them.
9)
Without looking to the tradition of Islam, people believe what the newspapers say.

But question what the Quran says!
"But question what the Quran says!" this is one thing that i really dont like about muslims. The quran is unquestionable, the prophet is unquestionable etc etc... why would somebody say that something is unquestionable? only if there is something to hide. Agreed that the prophet has extreme respect of the muslims, so much so that each time his name is uttered they also utter "peace be upon him" along with it. Sometimes I feel that the prophet himself would not have minded criticism because he was a humble man...but his followers do! rajavinae kalum veliya rajabhakthi!. Fact remains that you cannot shut peoples mouth however much you try, and criticism(even if you are God, because God himself made it that way) is bound to happen. The responsible thing to do in this scenario will be to respond in a mature way, do discussions and dispel doubts, not burn effigies and issue death threats to cartoonists.

Last but not the least i have one more grouse against the muslim people. They only cry and make noise when another muslim is hurt, never when another christian or hindu is hurt. Slobodan Milosevic and Saddam Hussein were perfect parallels. Both were dictators, both killed muslims/their own country men by the thousands. But when NATO(full of christian nations) attaked Slobodan who was happily killing his muslims no muslim nation uttered a single word of protest. When the same nations attacked iraq... well all hell breaks loose.

I have seen similar mails like this one which bring out the muslim point of view(but this one was definitely a gem of a mail) but never have I seen a muslim mail saying that Saudi arabia does not allow other religions in its soil or that most muslim nations(except maybe turkey) are very very intolerant to other religions.The pakistani cricketer mohammad yousuf had converted to Islam, nobody said a word, but in that same country there is a law saying that if a muslim converts, he will die. Why these double standards? why do Muslims want tolerant governments every where in the world but they themselves will not be tolerant?

In the end if the muslim really wants to be taken seriously, he has to start reacting against all issues not just muslim issues. The changeI feel needs to come from inside Islam not from outside. Instead of issuing fatwas against Salman Rushdie and Taslima Nazrin(she worte about the plight of hindus in bangladesh) maybe the muslim should start issuing fatwas against terrorists who use the name of Islam and kill innocent people.